Mommy Tip Tuesday

 

  I started driving my kids to and from school a couple years ago after a pretty big incident involving Justin that the driver handled quite terribly. He had been suffering some pretty bad bullying for several months without my knowing, by some older girl, and finally retaliated. If you know Justin, he's pretty easy going and very kind, but being the 5th boy in a large family, he tends to handle things himself once he's had enough. The driver is a former jail guard, so she can be pretty intimidating. She punished him with an incident report, which if you get three of, you lose bus riding privileges for. Then she told me about the situation from her perspective in front of him when I went to meet him off the bus. When we got inside, the 3 children all broke down crying and things that had been going on for quite some time started spilling out. Immediately I tried to get a hold of the head of the bus system, but he was out. I called Justin's teacher and notified the school councilor (who apparently had a lot of experience with the bully) and they both said they would watch the situation.

This incident is what made me realized that the bus driver was putting a lot of stress on my kids daily. If they were running a minute late, or if they had a limb in the isle, a pencil out to do their homework, turned around to talk to the person behind them...she was on them constantly. Occasionally stopping the bus to yell at all of the kids for their behavior. I tried to get a hold of the bus system head to let him know the issues we were having for a good two weeks. I started realizing that I loved dropping them off and picking them up. I was the last one to see them before they entered the school, and the first one to greet them coming home. It became a time I could really connect with them. I come to  what all their favorite parts of the day were, how the music teacher is obsessed with coffee, whether they were getting along with their friends, who their friends were...the list goes on and on.

It's been two and a half years since this experience now. Other neighbor kid's parents drive their children now too. I suppose I should really resolve things with the bus driver head, but don't plan to stop driving my children anytime soon. There is more history than I was able to describe here, but I'm giving you the shortened version. The moment we reached our breaking point. Suffice it to say that the driver has been driving my children since Michael, who is in 10th grade, was in elementary school. I asked for a different driver when Alyssa, now in 5th grade, was in Kindergarten. It never changed. I'm a problem solver, not a complainer. 😀

My tip is this: 

Connect with your Kids.

Know what's going on in their lives. 
There will never be an age where this isn't important or valuable. 
Their concerns always matter. 
These relationships are precious, and will last beyond this life. I really believe that.
I'm grateful to my own mother who was always there for the six of us. It wasn't easy, it was often very difficult. But she held firm and consistent in her care and nurturing. I still turn to her for wisdom and comfort. What a HUGE blessing!